Alabama's Week in Weird: A ChumCity Roundup

Here's your dose of Alabama craziness, served up ChumCity style!

Bingo Bungle in Greene County!

You know gambling and corruption go hand-in-hand, right? Turns out Greene County Sheriff Jonathan Benison allegedly went on a $4.97 million bingo fund spending spree! Think undocumented payments to employees ($3.16 mil!) and consultants ($2.16 mil!). He's been ordered to repay... good luck with that.

Finebaum Benched? Or Nah?

Did Paul Finebaum get yanked from ESPN's main stage after floating a 2026 Alabama Senate run (and name-dropping some wild stuff)? He supposedly said something about Charlie Kirk. ESPN denies the benching, pointing to his SEC Network gig. Who knows what's really going on here!

National Guard Coming to Illinois?

Trump's reportedly sending 400 Texas National Guard troops to Illinois to protect federal buildings. This follows 1,000 immigration arrests and some associated kerfuffles. Trump already federalized 300 Illinois Guard members over the objections of the governor and mayor. Prepare for political fireworks!

Senator's Phone Monitored? Outrage!

Senator Tommy Tuberville (yes, that Tommy Tuberville), along with Senators Graham and Blackburn, had their phone records checked out by Jack Smith's DOJ team during a Trump-related probe. Tuberville's not happy, calling it an "outrageous breach" and comparing it to North Korea and China. Yikes!

Montgomery Crime Watch Blows Up

Shannon Ferrari, who runs Montgomery's massive citizen-run "Crime Watch" Facebook page, went off on Mayor Steven Reed. She's calling for his resignation (or at least some leadership) after his "jump off a bridge" remark to shooters. Accusations are flying about fudged crime stats and understaffed police. Drama!

Montgomery Shootout Fallout

Mayor Reed is blaming Alabama's permitless carry laws for the recent Montgomery shootout. But, other cities in Alabama don't have this issue, hmmm? Governor Ivey's sending in reinforcements from ALEA to patrol downtown.

Dems vs. the Immigrants...and Zambia?

Tommy Tuberville's back, accusing Democrats of prioritizing healthcare for illegal immigrants over everything else. Senator Kennedy claims Dems want millions for foreign programs, including LGBTQ initiatives in the Balkans and Uganda, Haitian male prostitutes, Palestinian media, and... wait for it... circumcisions and vasectomies in Zambia. You can't make this stuff up!

Stay tuned to ChumCity for more Alabama oddities!